Yes I do requests... hows a Heroinhead to survive if he doesn’t turn a few tricks now and again? This one’s for Lou over at http://brokenheartedmom.blogspot.com/ .
The Heroin Addict Vs The Junkie*
Within heroin culture there are myriads of different people one will encounter, and as with many other parts of society these groups tend to stick together. There are smokers, snorters and shooters, those that snowball and those who wash their smack down with downers and booze. There are the depressed, the oppressed and the repressed, the mentally ill and the mentally sane. There are the young, the old, the dead and the dying. We are all in one house and we are all junkheads. We all crave the same drug and we all double up in illness when it comes a knockin'. But some of us accept that illness before others. Some of us do not break certain rules, and some of us are lucky enough not to need to. We are all dope fiends but we are not all junkies. In this post I will try to explain the difference.
I will start by saying that I am a heroin addict. I am not a junkie and never have been. I have crossed that road and I’ve assisted in it, but I have never taken it. There are many things I am just not willing to do for a bag. In contrast, my father was and many of my friends are junkies... out and out. When you’re in their company you’d do well to glue your shoes to your feet and padlock your trouser closed, because if there’s anything that can be stolen and sold, it will be.
A junkie is noticeable. He/she is the visible side of heroin addiction. The junkies habit is out of control and has led to a certain lifestyle. This lifestyle is of cheating, lying and stealing to get their dope money. A junkie scores on a day to day basis and from waking up doesn't quite know where that days drug money is coming from. He is open to most ideas, starting small and getting progressively more desperate as the day wears on. The point when he retires and accepts withdrawal is when he is sick. Until that point almost anything goes. The junkie is the scruffy, unkempt jack-the-lad that will wish you well as you leave on a shopping trip and then scramble up your drainpipe and in your window as soon as you turn off the street. He will ask you for money and if you refuse he will steal it. If you do lend it to him you can be sure you’ll never see it again. If you do it will be a symbolic gesture: “I have your money... but can I borrow it again until next Tuesday?” Next Tuesday? Well, we all know Tuesday never comes.
But junkies are not bad people, they are the creation of an addiction that has gotten out of control. Being a junkie is an economic problem, not a fashion statement. Not one junkie I know enjoys thieving, and all have a conscience. If they could fund their addictions without resorting to theft or underhand activities they would. No-one enjoys that kind of pressure and the last thing a heroin addict needs for a bad day is an arrest, or the police knocking down their door. When people talk of losing a loved one to heroin they are in fact referring to the junkie lifestyle.
In contrast to the junkie is his cousin: the 'stable heroin addict'. Stable heroin addicts are almost undetectable (unless you live with one). As long as they have their drugs they will perform and remain a valuable asset to society. They will work and pay taxes, do their shopping and pay their rent. They will hold intelligent conversation and will give you their undivided attention. The heroin addicts priority is in planning their addiction, in making sure they have their dope well in advance and not scored on a faily basis. They are able to buy bulk and ration properly. If funds are tight they will adapt their usage to that. Your Director, bank-manager or author of your favourite blog may be a stable heroin addict... you just wouldn’t know.
I am sometimes guilty of joking around this subject, but there is a real serious side to this distinction. Because junkies have a hard time supplying their habits they will often be using other opiates or downers and alcohol. Downers, anti-depressants and booze on top of heroin are lethal. Between 90-95% of all fatal overdoses are due to a concoction of drugs. The junkie runs a much higher risk of heroin death than the stable addict. Junkies also run an increased risk of contracting HIV and/or hepatitis. They are often in the position where they have to share equipment. Not so much needles, but spoons and water and citric and filters. The reason why heroin is shared in the spoon and not divided by hand is that former is an exact division (sucked up in milligrams) and the latter a division by eye. When done by sight, each party always thinks they’ve had the bad deal. So for peace of mind, its all into the spoon and then everyone draws up equal amounts of equally diluted smack. That's how it works. But in that draw, all it takes is one infected needle, one microscopic bacteria, and everyone is playing Russian Roulette. The junkie walks a fine line each day, and it is one that I couldn’t keep my balance on.
As this post was from a request by Lou, it is only fair the last paragraph is about her.
Lou has a junkie son. He is called Andrew. Unfortunately Andrew is ‘out of bounds’ at the moment. Lou has experienced the lot: the lies, the scams, the stolen money and missing jewellery. She’s had her car stolen, her bedroom ransacked and probably her video recorder pinched. She’s had the early morning police calls and the bail charges. Her son Andrew made a road trip of US prisons and then went back for more. He has been in and out of rehab and jail for a long time. Lou loves Andrew, but Lou thinks she has lost her son. She has, but not forever. I tell Lou this whenever I can. I have to, because if Andrew is lost then so am I.
Keep heart Lou... It was never your fault.
Shane. X
Ps: Andrew's release date is in 239 days 1 hour and 10 minutes. If that doesn't seem long imagine being Lou, and if it still doesn't seem long try being Andrew.
Showing posts with label Amitryptiline. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Amitryptiline. Show all posts
Heroin Addicts Vs Junkies - A request.
*The word 'junky' was coined at the beginning of the 20th century and used to describe New York addicts who scoured the rubbish dumps and vacant lots looking for scrap metal they could sell in order to get the money for their next shot.
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