The Songs of Memoires

The appalling things I uploaded last week and had the good humour to call 'songs' are now here:

Out of Time, tune and hope - The Songs of Memoires

If five weren't enough to scare you away for good, well there's now been a few more added... and more are on their way...

Leave comments below or just send me a turd in the post...

All My Thoughts, Shane. X

ps: New Memoires post to follow very soon...

64 comments :

Big Mark 243 said...

I don't know what to say. I often wonder what it is that people 'in the business' need to see in a person before they decide to give them their opportunity? I know that it is hard to find someone to say 'yes' and give you that chance.

Perhaps I will come back and not only listen but give an opinion on all of the songs. The first two are promising but my strength is flagging and tomorrow is a big day.

Take care and be well!!
L&R
Mark

Unknown said...

putting oneself out "there", speaking one's truth, leaving room for great things to happen....

these are the challenges for me in life...

i'm wowed..

ws

Sweden said...

so THATS what you sound like then.
Fun to know.

George A. said...

listened to your music tonight - reminded me of Doherty quite a bit - sure that's obvious... I always fall short when imparting to a fellow junkie good tidings, or whatnot, but I hope you're ok - best I can do... what's a "Yannick" anyway... who cares right.

talk to you soon, maybe

George

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Hiya Mark,

Thanks for your visit... and come back and listen whenever you like... though they probably won't be here.

All My best, Shane.

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Hey Warrior Scout... that's a pleasure you coming across.

I think you put yourself out there anyway... if you're here, you're there...

X

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Swedz,

Unfortunately, yes. X

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Hiye George A,

Er... I think you mean Doherty sounds like me... the thieving bastard.

We both come from London... neither of us can sing... and who's more wasted than who, well... only time will tell.

Anyxay, he vcan have them for a couple of bags... and I'm not talking sand.

Yannick was my first smack dealer in France. He was possibly the worst dealer that there has ever been. I pulled a knife on him once... The only time I've ever done such a thing. The bastard shit himself and still gave me a short measure!!! Can you believe that?

Take care George and hope we'll see you again soon... Shane. X

The Girl From Back Then said...

There's something lingering and awkward and desperate about them. Like the feeling of addiction and desperation but not devoid of charm.

I can't seem to say what they mean to me, more just a feeling saying i know what that is like.

Stacy said...

i love your songs, shane...thank you for sharing them. xxx

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

hey Verity & thanks so much for taking the time to comment.

It's how the songs affect you I suppose. Personally I think they're quite upbeat and happy... but my mind is shot, so I'm probably delusional.

You keep well and thnak you ooce again, Love & Thoughts, Shane. XXX

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Hiya Stacy... well you had an advanced listen and so had a little more time.

Thanks for all the gifts you've sent me... they're forever treasured.

Love Shane. XXX

Sarah said...

So lovely to be able to put a voice to stories and pictures. Hope your OK and my favorite is 'I Only Fuck You When I'm Drunk'. Take care x x x

Dusty Rose said...

I like them a lot. Especially the first too. Get yourself some writing credits on one of his albums, lots of great songs been sold for bags. I think Townes Van Zandt tried to sell his hole catalogue for a sixty.
I was just thinking today what'm I gonna do without having anything new to read from Shane these days besides and occasional e-mail,
and looky here.
Glad I caught them before they disappear.
All the beast,
Dustydee.

Jon B said...

Yes, I liked 'I Only Fuck You When I'm Drunk' too - the only one i didn't really like was "Tale Of A Petty Thief" (bit tuneless imho) but the rest are all fine. In fact you got quite a nice voice Particularly liked the first of the "Two Songs". (the second part "suicide suit" is ok too & i like the chorus line "well she finally says to me,I hate those dirty bastards that make up my family" - great! They have an honesty & directness which is very appealing

All the best mate

Ruby Tuesday said...

Dear Shane...
This took me back to the first time I heard Punk Rock..raw.. I loved it. I had always been a soul girl until I heard the voice of Johnny Rotten and found myself pogoing in Eric's.
Totally free totally me.. with a diamond glued to my nose as I was a fake punk, too vain to really go the whole way and too scared of my mother..
I love the lyrics, its so strange to hear your voice .. I know that you are from London but hadn't imagined how you spoke.
I really like the first song about your dealer and I also liked Freestyler...Tale of a petty thief was the one that took me back to my punk days..Fab
Doing Mike Peters hair tomorrow lead singer of "The Alarm" and lead singer now of "Big Country"..
I bet he would love these lyrics and sound..also ex Eric's fan :)
Love Ruth xx

Anonymous said...

john fruschiante's DC recordings etc, in his hotel room personal heroin heavan/hell period possibly my favourite track in the world is REPEATING, intense lyrics off that ep but the others are allright aswell. we all can't get it right the first time. recorded just before he was rescued from chronic dental and physical health, now eating organic steaks and making millions back in L.A and jamming with the mars volta who i wrote yo u about previously. love the good samaritan, new blog by the berry bye

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Hiya Sarah & Thanks... Oh I hate my voice (even more when I speak). In fact I am useless at talking and to meet me in person I think it would be hard to reconcile my voice to my words. I am the worst dinner party guest ever... though I'm quite good at the 'flicking the peas' part... in fact it's me who always starts it.

LOVE & thoughts, Shane. X

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Jon B,

tale of a petty thief is supposed to be like that. I make two types of sone:

1) more melody based
2) Poems over one chord

So the Petty Thief one is a poem I mouth over a chord and is monotonous but that is because the words are what are important and not the melody. I think in that sense it's OK, but yeah, as a song it could probably be fatally boring.

Anyway, thanks for listening and giving your opinion... it's appreciated.

All My Best, Shane.

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Fuck up Mike Peters hair... go on!!!! Then I'll post pictures of him here and ruin his career! just dop something really ridiculous to him... tell something about "revenge of a generation for Big Country"!

Thanks for listening to the songs... even more for commenting... Love and Thoughts, Shane. XXX

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Thanks Doctor!

I'm gonna set up a blog just for the sketches of songs and then remove them from here. I've literally hundreds... and you're gonna be forced to listen to them all!!!!

XXX

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Hiya Claire,

I like the immediacy of writing songs. You can have half an idea and get an immediate reaction. I think that is also why I prefer writing online.

For me songs don't nned to be finished or polished to have meaning... Even if I sat down and wrote second verses and middle eights the songs wouldn't be any better or worse (other than from a technical pov).

Anyway.... great as ever to see you over here... Love & Wishes, Shane. XXX

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Hiya Claire,

I like the immediacy of writing songs. You can have half an idea and get an immediate reaction. I think that is also why I prefer writing online.

For me songs don't nned to be finished or polished to have meaning... Even if I sat down and wrote second verses and middle eights the songs wouldn't be any better or worse (other than from a technical pov).

Anyway.... great as ever to see you over here... Love & Wishes, Shane. XXX

Anonymous said...

Shane,
This is my first comment here. I really love the blog, read it from start to finish in the space of a few evenings, and admire the way in which you seem to be able to understand and forgive people and their motivations, the kind of 'causal' way you look at social problems. I am not a heroin user but I have used other drugs, alcohol is my drug of choice, but I have long been fascinated by heroin. If you don't mind I'd like to ask one question; do you still get a good high from heroin after all those years of use? Sorry if I'm prying, it's just something that always intrigued me, whether long term drug users still enjoy the drug or whether it is merely a habit, medication or something else.
Much love,
Tom

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Hiya Tom,

Well anyone who gives me that amount of time has my immediate respect... so Thank You!

95% of readers here are not users... all are quite liberal in their politics... so you'll be at home.

Prying? Oh, you can ask me anything you like here...I'm not an information nazi. If I can answer I always will.

I can only speak for myself. I do not feel heroin as I once did... but it still puts the world at arms distance. But mostly it's out of habit and/or medication. But really medication is why most people start anyway.

I think most addicts would agree that the feeling we used to get is now hard. But sometimes some extra potent gear will come on the scene and allow us a bit of that old effect.

Anyway, thanks once again... All my Best, Shane?. X


Shane,
This is my first comment here. I really love the blog, read it from start to finish in the space of a few evenings, and admire the way in which you seem to be able to understand and forgive people and their motivations, the kind of 'causal' way you look at social problems. I am not a heroin user but I have used other drugs, alcohol is my drug of choice, but I have long been fascinated by heroin. If you don't mind I'd like to ask one question; do you still get a good high from heroin after all those years of use? Sorry if I'm prying, it's just something that always intrigued me, whether long term drug users still enjoy the drug or whether it is merely a habit, medication or something else.
Much love,
Tom

piggyinthemiddle said...

Props for posting this lot Shane. Love the lyrics. Erm, interesting musical style too

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

PiggyintheMiddle,

thats a very polite way of saying "They Suck!!!!" haha

Cheers!

Shane. X

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Sweden, where are my kisses?!!!!

I thought you had a crush on me? Am I not worth at least a few little x's? I must be..

X

JoeM said...

I really like these. They remind me of different things. The first one of Space oddity era Bowie. Others sound sort of 60sish and Tales of a Petty Thief sounds sort of punky. And yes Pete Docherty's there too in some.

I think I like Freestyler best. Or maybe the last one.

I only fuck you when I’m drunk reminds me of

Pet Shop Boys/You only tell me you love me when you’re drunk

First line:

What a performance tonight

Been there…

So you write, paint AND sing/play guitar? What next - tap dancing!

Actually, being skilled in so many areas can be a drawback - sometimes stops you focusing on one. Sometimes it’s the really single-minded people who get on (or in the case of footballers, single brain celled).

Don’t take them down. You never know who could be reading this blog…

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Hiya Joe,

I'll explain how I ended expressing myself in different media.

I always wanted to write.. that was my first love. But I this idea that until I would be at least thirty my words would have no weight... that I wouldn't have enough insight into the world to be able to preach about it. So I put off writing, or the idea of a novel, and instead picked up the guitar. But not for the music, for the texts. It was a way I could write and have my words heard. That's why I only learnt enough guitar to sing a little over.. i never cared to be a musician.

Then came heroin and my friend who would play with me died. I sold our guitars and gave up that dream. I started writing more but it was hard. I still didn't have the confidence to write about life... I was still living it.

Just as I reached the age where I felt I could write I moved to France and no-one understood what I wrote. I was not online and the only way in a foreign country I could have a voice was in images. So I put all my effort into painting. Once I had found my feet (and then lost them) I ended up online. It put me back in touch with an english speaking audience and so I went exclusively back to words... and thats where I'll stay.

Three of those songs are over 12 years old. I still bash one out every couple of weeks, but more as a filler between standing up and sitting back down.

I think my biggest influence is not a band but kinda that 80's Depeche Mode.. Marc Almond kind of sound (the voice). I can't sing like that, but try within limits.

Pet Shop Boys... The opening verse to West End Girls, one of the greatest verses ever written. I recite that as poetry and it never loses anything. The second verse isn't bad either. I was always scared I had nicked "I only fuck you when I'm drunk" from somewhere, but after years of not finding it I claimed it as my own. But you may have a point about the Pet Shop boys title... it's possibly that which i had heard somewhere and then corrupted it.

I'm gonna take the songs down from here, but I will set up a blog just for the music as i have hundreds of songs I've written over the years. It'll be linked directly from here though. I may even set them up on one of the pages up top.

I've got this great idea for a new project online.. i'll send you details very soon. just sketching it out. But it's a really nice idea at the moment...

All My Thoughts, Shane. X

Tristram's Mum said...

YOUR SONGS ARE SHIT!!!!!

AND YOU KILLED MY SON!

JoeM said...

Well that artistic evolution makes sense.

Almond/Soft Cell was and is a favorite.

The Pets are supreme in their integration of music/art/literature etc. If you're not that familiar I'd say Behaviour is their best. Very melancholy - the nostalgic Being Boring is typical.

Tristram's Mother - when a son ends up dying in a toilet bowl I say Look To The Mother!

_Black_Acrylic said...

@ Shane, agreed on the PSB line being poetry. Neil Tenant wanted a pop music equivalent of The Waste Land, and he really nailed it. Coincidentally I've just spent all week on a post about Bobby Orlando for DC's. Bobby O produced West End Girls and was the catalyst for much of their early success. Then he jacked in music to write a book discrediting Darwin... but that's a whole other story ;-)

Your music is cool, of course. I've only had a quick listen so far but I really like Yannick. It's more freeform and abstract, maybe that's what I like. I can hear something a bit Current 93 in there.

Anyway kudos and love to you Shane, as ever
Ben x

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Hiya Ben...

Current 93!!! get outta here! That's one of the worst insults I've ever received... and that includes insults shouted at me, forget the music!

i've never suffered from depression, but you're pushing it with that one.. haha

Current 93... Oh la la... that hurts

take care Ben... and hope you're well.

Love and Thoughts, Shane. X

MomIC said...

Shane,

I know all them songs so well! Remember you creating them. Great times.
Anyway, love Tristram's mum's comment!!! :)

Have a nice sunday!

Love,

Mary xxx

_Black_Acrylic said...

sheesh Shane, I like Current 93... it was meant as a compliment! Maybe you should erase Yannick from your hard drive ;-)

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Hey Ben... oh, I know what you meant well. Actually I had never heard of them before and searched around for twenty minutes to get a listen. I was quite excited at who I may be nicking from, but when i finally found them... It wasn't for me. I think I even knew that just from the song titles. Tibet can sing better than me, though... so I won't be suiing... but he's lucky! Actually, no he's not...

X

JoeM said...

"It's your love it's Laura
That girl you once adored her
Now she's hanging from the ninety-first floor"

Oh, tell my love, tell Laura
To hang on a little longer
'cause I'd like to push her off myself

As vicious as Morrissey!

Now that's a comparison you won't argue with...

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Joe M... no I won't argue with that... just smile. The chords to that 'song' are the same as There is a Light that Never Goes Out... and I'm gonna go and put The Queen is dead on repeat play right now. It's been a while...

X

Gledwood said...

Glasgow kiss!!

Iliked that one

did ya read any ov Valerie?

i uploaded more of her the other day but didn't want the obscenity on my blog i might put it back seeing as its all gone dingbats anywya

Gledwood said...

can i hear that? i can't hear anything

not like me, hearing the stairs talk to me as i walk down em me fucking nutter aye aye hi as the sky

better than fucking drugs

THIS is what NA call a higher power it put me away from heroin so i'm forever grateful for that

FUCKING HEROIN!!!!

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Hiya Gledwood... I've just sent you a mail, but will reply here just for the history.

Glasgow Kiss.. oh, it's not an original line... an old sayung, surprised you've never heard it. There the Belfast Breakfast too.. but I think that's a major kick in.

I never curse heroin... I think turning to heroin is a sensible reaction when you look around at the world and see what's going on. Who wouldn't want to escape from that? Not taking drugs and thinking you're happy in this world is a bigger problem. I also think it's not so much "fucking heroin!!!" but more the life we must leadd if we fall into that. I'm sure it could be a miracle drug if it were regulated properly... especially for me! haha

Take care Gleds, and don't let the world turn you insane.. that's one victory too much. X

Sid said...

Love it!

I met doherty in rehab once... (someone said your music sounded like him)

Im a grade eight pianist.. I dont think I could cope without music, ive always used it as an escape!

Hope your good!

Anonymous said...

i would like to be your guitar for a day.

oxo

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Hiya Sid, thats nice you like the songs.

Grade eight pianist? Wow... Thats almost as good as me!! haa haa

I tried keeping on time with a metronome once... even that got pissed off. I just cannot keep time...

Hope You're well... Love & Thoughts, Shane. X

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Anon... be my guitar for a day??? God, you must be one of them people who like abuse. If my guitar was anything other than wood and glue it would be long dead by now... by the sounds of it, it is anyway...

X

Anonymous said...

yes, sometimes i am a glutton for punishment.

Anonymous said...

lizzy was right...futile.

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Anon... yep, it's futile... I'm a very hard man to seduce.. X

Anonymous said...

i'm very sorry to hear that. it was worth a try...

oxo

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Anon... Well, it's hard but not impossible... so You can still try, I don't object... though you'll have to try harder than to do it with one line...

one line's never enough... X

Anonymous said...

while your last comment did make me smile, because “there is nothing so cruel in this world as the desolation of having nothing to hope for” (h. murakami), the reality of it is, is that no matter what i say, you will undoubtedly say something better. you always do...

oxo

Anonymous said...

what i was (ineloquently) saying is when it comes to words, you are out of my league...

ps - please let me know if i am getting anywhere...oxo

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Anon... your comment has kinda answered why its so difficult to seduce me:because I'm the seducer.

Can you seduce a seducer? X

Anonymous said...

apparently,not.

Anonymous said...

i don't want to miss you, but i do.

Anonymous said...

I do as well.
xoxo

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Anon...

Everyone misses me, then they realize I'm there, remember what a fucking nuisance I am, and then want shot of me again!

People like me... until I'm sitting besides them. XX (2 this time)

* * * *

The Kiss-o-meter

X = Me being polite, or you're a good friend and ones enough.

XX = One on each cheek... continental.

XXX = Good friend, emotional response, or for the depressed.

XXXX = You've touched something downstairs

XXXXX = I've definitely got a hard-on

XXXXXX = It's rubbing against your leg

XXXXXXX = You didn't move away and now my teeth are on your neck

XXXXXXXX = Ooops, it's sprung out and is single-minded

XXXXXXXXX = You've encouraged me too much and I didn't need encourtagement. We will end this embrace as lovers.

XXXXXXXXXX = Just for the One I Love.

Anonymous said...

ha ha...thank you. i'm sure i will find that guide very helpful.

xxxx

Sweden said...

Yes i totally internet love you, this is true!
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO lol
how can a girl not, you are intersesting, tortured, and have a beautiful face. Complicated people are the most attractive in my eyes.

Sweden said...

hopefully my ONE X will eventually turn into more one day (from you) haha, i dont leave a lot of comments but i do lurk your many blogs yes

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Sweden... Lurk My blogs??? Oh My God then you must have seen my willy... Juist hope the squinting never damaged your eyes! haha

More kisses...

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX...
a
OHHhhhhhhh.. aahh...

Tissues, please... or that old sock will do.

Sweden said...

....wait, there is a penile unit shot out there of you?
Interesting.
But i much rather look at your face.

Memoirs of a Heroinhead said...

Sweden... oh yeah, a couple of naughty photos (before the penis enlargement pills!!! lol) so you may have to zoom in 300%!

Maybe I can have a picture of my face tattoed on my dick and then everyone wins??? just an idea...

Hope you're well... all wonderful here..

Shane, XXX